Friday, September 25, 2009

Yielding the Pen: To The Manner Born

Fabulous readers,

I think you are really going to enjoy this essay. Perhaps one of the greatest short how-to manuals on being a great, and sexy hostess I have read.

I hope you will help me welcome my colleague Toad (of Toad Hall), from the thoughtful and ever-elegant (former?) lifestyle blog, To the Manner Born.

Very truly,

My instructions were brief. Describe "the sexy hostess, be controversial". Sounds easy doesn't it? I thought it may have been a trick question.

For the past several weeks I have paid close attention to the wisdom of The Blushing Hostess's guest contributors. I have enjoyed their stories, I have not always concurred. I come from a different point of view than my confreres. I have changed the article from a to the. Controversy is rarely simpler than stating the obvious.

The Sexy Hostess is YOU, how could it be otherwise?

Sexy lives between our ears. It doesn't require vast outlays, large wardrobe, servant class, a choice of music or multiple wines. The Sexy Hostess is appropriate for all social settings. It doesn't have a use-by date. It goes on like a dab of cologne. The trick is getting it from between your ears to between your guests'.

So how do we get from here to there?

Take my arm. We'll go for a stroll.

As hostess, the first half of the battle is over. You have invited guests, they've responded they want to be with you. What's sexier than wanting to be wanted?

Gentlemen are taught from an early age, a tuxedo looks its best when it's mentally put on an hour early. It's formal yet it requires a certain nonchalance. The Sexy Hostess mentally puts her party on early as well.

First and foremost, a half hour before your guests arrive, take a deep breath. Relax. It needs to be a party for you as well. To paraphrase Maxminimus, a party smells stress like a new pair of GTH pants, and its a killer. Of course, last minute things need doing. Relax, its you they are coming to see.

Next, put on a smile. Prepare to have fun. To regale and be regaled. Smiles are the Sexy Hostess's best friend.

As your guests arrive, delegate some tasks if you must, so that you may greet each arrival. Set the mood. Lock eyes, smile, tell them how glad you are they arrived. Make your guests feel comfortable, and they are the only people in the room.

The Sexy Hostess takes time for each of her guests, especially those she doesn't know well. How? She asks questions. Never, what do you do?, but ask them to tell you something about themselves. Learn something about them. Why invite people you don't want to know?

Obviously, introduce them to others in the room. Show that you have listened, introduce them to someone with similar interests. Make connections.

And finally, when something goes wrong, and it will, don't panic. You have a house full of friends. They want to help and ensure you have a great time. Now, that's sexy.



Design Esquire said...

Great post! I love all of the advice.

~Tessa~Scoffs said...

Makes me want to have a party - right now!

Deanna said...

Enjoyed this read...yes, indeed.

bess shepherd said...

I have not been able to find Toad's
blog yesterday or today. I hope
everything is ok. best wishes.

Jo said...

Lovely advice to keep on hand.


little augury said...

This is wonderful! Great advice and one I'll file away-for my next party. GT

Renovation Therapy said...

Toad is wonderful as always. I'm sad that his blog has vanished.

ADG said...

Toad was the reason I started blogging. I'm hatin' that he's gone.