Thursday, September 3, 2009

Etiquette Challenge Workshop: If you had it to do over


We are going to complete our wedding registry this weekend. Will you and your readers help me not to forget anything important?

Palo Alto, CA

From my closets to yours: Two sauce/gravy boats. Soup spoons. Soup bowls. Small bowls. Silver trays of all sizes.

You can never have enough towels: Get more than you need, put some away to use down the road, when you have children and guests, you will need stacks. Blankets.

Non-necessities I would love to have: A sterling silver cover for the holiday bird and a toast rack for breakfast.

Best wishes to you both,

Well, Readers, please leave a comment and tell us what you would have put on your wedding gift registry if you could turn back time.


Gwennie said...

Having worked in a china store, and helping countless brides, I would tell you to envision your Thanksgiving table. At least two large platters (turkey and ham/beef), several china bowls (mashed potatoes, dressing, yams, green beans) and the Hostess is right, at least to gravy boats. I registered for double the amount of teaspoons, so they could be used for coffee or dessert. And I love my individual salt and peppers, no need to pass. I, also, registered for Christmas dishes.

Mrs. Blandings said...

I did register for silver salt and peppers without much thought. I had no idea how often I would use them.

pretty far west said...

Definitely nothing technical/electrical. A three-tier cake-stand.

Rona's Home Page said...

I would have added bath towels. I just love towels.

Deanna said...

Dear Blushing,
This is a challenge for sure.
Just celebrated my 35th Wedding Anni and my taste has changed so much through the years.

Started out very modern/ contemporary turned to more traditional.

Was thrilled to receive the gifts we received and still have the majority of items today!

The bed sheets that I received from my Grandparents has been put away for the memories since my Grands are long gone. A tablecloth from my other Grandma put away as well. Long gone.

But if I had to do it all over again...I would register for a complete china set with crystal stemware.


An Aesthete's Lament said...

Salt cellars, plain and simple. A fish platter. Silver candlesticks and a large supply of white dripless candles. Cocktail napkins. White linen tablecloths (several). Wine coaster (2). Double old-fashioned glasses (these come in handy for so many beverages).

MG said...

Honestly, I looking back, I think I would have registered for more practical items along with china and entertaining items.

After it was all said and done, we had china we use on occasion, but we had to make several trips to Home Depot. Items like basic tools, lawnmower, hose and ladder would be extremely helpful to have when starting a home together.

Marsha said...

When my husband and I registered, we were taken in hand by a older woman who was thrilled to have a couple willing to listen to her. She advised us to register for gravy boats, sugar and creamer sets, and salt and peppers in crystal or glass so that they could be used with any service. I'm so glad I followed her advice! We use these pieces so often and with every pattern we own. They are the items that are easily broken or lost but having others that easily coordinate (if not match) means we can still set a neat-looking table no matter what dishes are used.

I wish that I had registered for more towels. In the early years there never seemed to be enough. I also wish that we had foreseen that while we weren't cocktail drinkers at the time we soon would be. It also would have been nice to properly host our acquaintances who enjoyed something other than beer or wine.

Turquoise Diaries said...

This is a beautiful blog. I am sure I will learn lots of tips from you..

Bonjour Madame said...

I think the things I use the most are good champagne flutes and wine glasses (lots of them), platters for serving at parties, a good wine opener, real cloth napkins, good towels, cookbooks, and really nice pots and pans. Some things I rarely use are small appliances like slow cookers and blenders. I do however use my kitchen aid mixer and food processor a lot.

I am currently obsessed with Apilco plates at williams - sonoma and wish a gift of a complete set would arrive at my doorstep now :)

I would also suggest an au gratin pan or several smaller to medium sized baking dishes. I use these all the time.

anhesty said...

if i could re-register I would totally add towels to my list. But I love my 3 tier plate stand and decanter. use it all the time when i entertain.

thanks for stopping by blog. i hope you come back soon!

and i am def enjoying yours!

Newlywed Hostess said...

More Dinner plates in my china pattern for buffets(they are on my Christmas list now)
Individual Salt and Pepper shakers
Linens, linens, and more linens
More bowls in my china pattern (serving bowls that is)

The Countess of Nassau County said...

Gwennie nailed it, especially on the teaspoons.

My Dad was extremely ill in the lead up to the wedding and while my Mom is the ultimate "Martha" I didn't have the heart to bring up the subject of linens and gravy boats in the intensive care unit. In the ensuing chaos my soon-to-be husband attempted to register for a hair dryer. I kid you not.

While I still love our choices, I regret leaving off a few things altogether.

Bar ware - Go for the good stuff, but order according to what YOU drink or would serve. If it's beer, then gorgeous crystal pilsner glasses are in order. It's also not a bad idea to find a multipurpose wine glass and order many. I have about 50 and they are great for holidays and large parties.

Bread baskets - For both formal and casual use.

Linen napkins - Never enough.

Coffee Urn - When you're young it's not on your radar screen, but when you are hosting holiday dinners and other wonderful events like Christenings it's a must.

Serving Pieces - Don't just think about the covered veg. Think about what you would need to serve stylishly if you had friends over for drinks and appy. If you're drawing a blank this is an area where you need to stock up.

Post script - Dad made a full recovery and danced like a wild man at my wedding.

Erin said...

I vote for a vegetable steamer. I think that's the wedding gift we've used the most our almost 15 year marriage.

The OP is in Palo Alto. I'm in the Bay Area too. If she is 'California Casual' like we are, don't order too much miscellaneous china pieces. We're far more likely to have a meal outside on the patio than a formal dinner with crystal and china. That stuff has been seriously underused. YMMV.

the southern hostess said...

It's not sexy, but a vacuum.

Madame Meg said...

I second (or third):
- Extra teaspoons, even in everyday life it is the first thing we run out of!

- Multiple white linen table clothes (white is brilliant because it can be bleached, but if you manage to get an irremovable stain, you can always dye it!)

- Loads of cloth napkins, in sets of 5 more than the largest sit-down dinner you can imagine having! (someone always drops on the floor!) In colors that can go out together for a large buffet.

- And to care for those linens, a really nice iron with a good variable steam setting!

Congratulations and best of luck!
- Meg

Arabella said...

There is never such thing as too many towels.

A good glass martini shaker and stylish ice bucket.

Also, the more champagne flutes the better, as many have been broken over the years.

LindsB said...

I'm not much help in that department since I have not registered yet, but I am copying down everything that you all suggested- such great ideas I would have never though of- thank you!

Laura said...

I would not register for items that I consider to be disposables (short life) such as towels, sheets, and bedding. These items are affordable and easily replaced.

I would register for china but not china serving pieces. They are expensive and often look out-dated. I prefer crystal and silver as serving pieces with china.

I would also be a considerate bride and give guests a variety of price points.

I would register for an ornate stainless flatware pattern and my favorite sterling pattern. In the event that the sterling pattern is not completed, the stainless will work as a stand in.

My advice to my daughters? Do not forget about your future entertaining. Wedding gifts are wonderful for those occasions.


Have fun!

Vanya @ Endless Inspiration said...

Thanks for your kind comment on my blog. I love this silverware.

On my wedding list would definately be a dualite toaster - expensive, but designed to last a life time and look fantastic - a real design classic!

Courtney said...

Not sure if you can register for these, but gift cards! I know for some it's not very personal, but we ended up with about $1300 to Target and let me tell you.... That shopping trip being able to buy all the things of your choice was awesome!

But the things I'm glad we registered for and got were the complete white ceramic and stainless steel canister set from Williams-Sonoma. Love those!

Also, Cole and Mason salt and pepper mills, towels, sheets, picture frames (I always get compliments on them anytime we have visitors), and I love our really nice set of pots and pans.

I went out on a limb and registered for some things I didn't think we would get, basically some really expensive things that we couldn't afford. And I'm so glad we did because we ended up with some of those things!

We didn't register for any china and honestly I'm so glad we didn't. Everything we received gets used all the time. For us and our lifestyle, china would have only been used for holidays and we go to my parent's house for that! So my advice is to register for things you will use often, not once or twice a year! =)

Easy and Elegant Life said...

Bit late to the party, but...

A champagne bucket, double the number of salad forks (they work for a buffet), a silver hinged-lid ice bucket and tongs, damask napkins, trays, plain white china.